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What Type of Parent are You?February 13, 2012
The question I constantly ask myself is "Am I a good parent?" Sure I have days where I feel like I did a good job. I also have days where I feel defeated, annoyed and just plain worn out. I think it's only natural to feel this way. I mean I'm only human, right? Honestly though, there are days where I wonder if I'm doing a good job as a mom. One day not too long ago, I phoned my mom to let her know what a bad day I had. My oldest wasn't listening and was in time out a number of times. I told her I feel like I don't know if I'm doing the right thing sometimes. I explained how stressful parenting is because you just never really know if you’re making the right decisions. She told me something very wise. She said, "You will always question whether or not you are a good parent." "Trust that you're making the right decisions and stay strong." Those words have gotten me through some pretty tough parenting moments. It really made me think what type of parent I am. Did you know there are generally four types of parents?
Here's a list of the four:
Authoritarian -This is basically the parent that sets the rules and keeps the rules. No if's, and's or but's about it. The perfect answer is usually "Because I said so." If a child breaks the rules, the parent is quick to punish. Long term, the child is pretty successful and obedient. Unfortunately, the setbacks of children raised by an Authoritarian are that the child generally has low self-esteem and is less happy.
Permissive -Permissive parents are more laid back when it comes to raising their children. The view their child as a friend and often have less rules. They expect less from their child and often indulge them. Children with Permissive parents often grow up unhappy and have problems with authority figures.
Uninvolved - Uninvolved parents rarely participate in their child's lives and are detach themselves. They are often referred as negligent parents. Children of this type of parenting have trouble relating to people and aren't that successful.
Authoritative - Authoritative parents often set rules and expect them to be followed. They are nurturing parents and communicative. Even though they punish the child, when they break the rules, the punishment is set so that the child understands and is responsible for their actions. Children who grow up with this parenting style are usually happy and have good self-esteem.
I think we will always question our parenting choices. I really don't think there is a "right way" or "wrong way" to be a good parent. I think as long as there are plenty of rules and plenty of love, the rest will fall into place.
With that said, looking at the four types of parents, what do you think? What type of parent are you?